Time is on our side

I have been so emotional and nostalgic. This new life of motherhood, working and now moving has got me all worked up. Our house is a disaster. Leeor made a kick-ass roast chicken tonight, a la Alice Waters. He was so funny. "What's her name?" he asked, gesturing toward the kitchen where the cookbook lay open atop the toaster oven. Apparently, she suggests dipping one's bread into the leftover chicken fat, which we both found kinda gross. Ah well.


The chicken has been eaten, Avi has been in bed for hours (his new bed time seems to be 7:30 but I'll keep my fingers crossed) and here I sit on our couch, surveying the landscape of this home we will soon vacate.


There are boxes everywhere. Shabbat candles have almost burned all the way down. My dancing Shiva remains on the mantle next to the candles and some photos of the 3 of us. Avi's toys abound. It's amazing how much he has changed. He is babbling like a mad man. I love it. He says ah-ba and da-da with incredible frequency. Leeor loves it, as Aba is the Hebrew word for dad. The only times I've heard him say anything close to mama is when he's upset . . . M tells me she's heard it, too. And she taught him how to wave. I love it.

On Wednesday, my day off earlier this week, Avi and I went to Palo Alto in the morning with Leeor. We took a nice walk together and then rode Caltrain home. Avi loved being on the train. I thought he might fall asleep, but no, during the hour back to SF he alternately looked out the window in wonder, screamed delightedly, played with his toys, nursed (that was funny as I still occasionally spray milk everywhere and Caltrain is not exactly the place you wanna do that), and flirted with women. This was when I realized he really knows how to wave.


Today Leeor worked from home and we went over to our new place. I like to do that before moving in to get a sense of things and to begin to visualize where things will go, etc. The previous tenants (co worker of Leeor's) left a nice bottle of champagne in the refrigerator. And the place was spotlessly clean. It's exciting to imagine how we will occupy yet another space. I am already scheming . . .


Things feel pretty good. On one hand (this is the Libra in me, always trying to find balance), I feel like I can't keep up with life. There is a mountain of dirty laundry downstairs and I keep flaking on plans with girlfriends and mom's groups. Yet, I had a pretty satisfying day with my family. I took a beautiful walk with Avi this afternoon and reminisced about all our walks during my maternity leave. The sun was shining though the fog was on its way in. It was windy and cool but the canyon was filled with people walking dogs and saying hello and it was just lovely. Leeor and I got to have lunch together as well as dinner. Avi tried his first teething biscuit and babbled his way through the day. He is so amazing. Leeor was saying how he loves all of Avi's states of being--when he gets all wacky and loud and screechy as well as when he's quiet and contemplative. I couldn't agree more. I continue to feel so grateful, so full and though I get anxious about the darndest things, I am more and more finding my own way and being okay with that.

This photo of Avi is from last week, and again, the quality is crap cause it's from my phone, but one of these days we will get another damn memory card for the digital camera and get back up and running. . .